Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
The power of my boobs compel you
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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