I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
