It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize