Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
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