Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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