I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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