So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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