We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
