...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
