Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
