There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
