I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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