Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
