How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
porn star boner night. come get it.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
