Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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