sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
My orgasm happened in two different decades
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
