The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
