Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
She's like a pop up book from hell.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
