He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
