Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
They have beer where we have blood.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
