i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
