Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
