I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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