he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I think your dad took our porno
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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