i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
