Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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