maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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