I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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