Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
