Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
