Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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