Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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