he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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