you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
