I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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