She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
