They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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