After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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