Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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