i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
