I queefed so loud it echoed.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Randomize
