Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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