remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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