Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Life without a bra equals bliss.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
