Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize
