They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
