Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
