Sry I called you an 8
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
