I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
