I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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